There was a dark time in my life where I truly struggled with finding the joy in each day. I didn’t want to live. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to do ANYTHING. I struggled with getting through each day and that was a very difficult way to live. I knew I had to be strong for my kids, but it was hard. I didn’t want to be strong. I didn’t want to be the one who held everything together. What I really wanted to do was crawl into a warm, cozy cave, curl up into a ball, and cry. I wanted to escape. I wanted to find myself anywhere but where I was in life. It was hard for me to be able to explain what I was feeling to others. And honestly, I didn’t really want to have to explain what was going on inside of me. I just wanted others to automatically understand. Looking back on that time, I should have allowed myself to open up to others and tell them what was going on inside, but I didn’t. I struggled longer than I needed to because of my own stubbornness. And I know now that was ok. Every person grieves and deals with loss in their own way and in their own time.
Therefore, I did the only other thing that I knew to do – I cried out to God. I poured my heart out to Him. I cried, I sobbed, and I told Him all of my hurts and brokenness. I allowed myself to finally admit to myself and to Him that I couldn’t continue this way. That I didn’t want to continue this way. It was a step. A small step in the journey back to happiness. I won’t tell you that the journey from that dark place was short. It most certainly did not happen overnight. Slowly my attitude began to improve. I started to find joy in the things that I once had. I began to see the positive side of things and stopped looking for the negative.
It’s all about starting out with one small step in the right direction. I read a quote one time that went something like, “You may take ten thousand steps in a day, but they only count if they are steps in the right direction.” And that is very true. Every new day is another opportunity to take one small step in the right direction. Start your day off by giving it over to our Heavenly Father. Ask Him to guide each and every step along the way and before you know it, you will be pleasantly surprised at the ground you’ve gained and the progress you’ve made.
I hope that this post will touch your heart and let you know that if you are struggling with something in your life, that you are never alone. God is waiting for you to meet Him wherever you are and He is there with open arms. He wants to comfort you, shower you with His unconditional love, and guide you along your way.
God bless you and yours today.